A (Not So) Grand Adventure
by Awkward-Pterodactly-Noises
Summary: The bell jingled merrily as a young blond haired woman burst out the door, only to wheel back around and yell after her "And that goes twice for your mother, ya slimy bastard!" before slamming the door so hard the frame shook, and then turn back around only to nearly bowl him over. John looked at her a moment before asking, "having a bit of a day then, are we?"
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: This story is set in modern times, but has Britain still being a vast empire with territories all across the globe. America still gained its independence is this story, simply so all the individual territories it used to be didn't become immensely confusing.

Donna smirked unrepentantly at her younger brother as John stood glaring at her, behind him he could her their younger sister Amy making a poor attempt to muffle her snickering. He cast his gaze to the heavens and silently asked whatever entity(s) residing there just why his sisters felt it necessary to ambush him with a water balloon right before a formal breakfast with their parents. As though his thoughts had summoned them, his mother Queen Margaret appeared in the hallway, his father King Jonathan III trailing behind her.

His sisters quickly composed themselves, "Morning mum." John said, in an attempt to pretend as though was not standing in the foyer of his parents wing, dripping water onto a priceless oriental rug.

His mother raised one eyebrow, his ploy having failed rather spectacularly. "And what," she paused, and surveyed the scene. Donna was standing primly next to John's left, having turned to face their parents. Amy was at the top of the staircase, hands clasped in front of her, face the picture of innocence. "..has transpired in the ten minutes you've been unsupervised?" she continued, the glint of amusement in her eyes alerting them to the fact that they were not truly in trouble. Behind her, their father failed to keep a straight face, as his eyes crinkled and the corners of his mouth turned up into a grin.

"Well," his mother remarked after a long moment in which no one spoke, "I suppose we better take breakfast in the garden then?" "No use in soaking the dining room upholstery." She cracked a mischievous grin as she said this, and even John had laugh at the though of sitting down in the dining room and having a formal breakfast dripping wet in his jim jams.

Line Break

Elsewhere in London…

"Wakey wakey eggs and bakey!" Rose singsonged as she opened the door of the flat she shared with her step-brother, she toed off her shoes and walked through the living room and into Jack's bedroom. "Im a vegetarian." he groaned into his pillow. "Well then wakey wakey vegetables and sadness." Rose replied with a grin.

Jack sat up and glared at the sun rising through the window like it had personally offended him. "Here." said Rose, proffering a takeout container. Jack eyed it with distrust. Rose laughed at the look on his face and reassured him, "Don't worry, it's eggs and peppers, nice and cheesy." Jack took the takeout container and grinned his thanks with a mouth already full of egg.

Rose looked vaguely green, "You're disgusting." she informed him, but the fondness in her eyes took the sting out of her words. He grinned at her again in response. Rose chose to be the bigger person and ignore him, she focused back on her objective. "You have to get up, you've work in an hour." Jack looked mutinous. She sighed quietly to herself. "I know you don't like it there, but work is work and we have to eat. Besides, didn't you apply for that 'Torchwood Program' thing?" Jack looked up in surprise, "Yeah I did, I had forgotten that. I should get the results back today actually." He grinned at the prospect. Rose smiled back at him, "Well there's your motivation to get through the day!" 'now I just have to find mine.' thought Rose.

Line Break

Rose's POV

Rose grumbled internally as she changed into her work uniform, the women's uniform for the Cyberman Cafe was uncomfortably revealing, and she hated it. Her boss was a creep, and the hours were awful. The only reason she kept the job was because it actually paid decently, and they wouldn't make rent without it.

Rose glanced around as she entered the kitchen through the back door, and she breathed a quiet sigh of relief when could see no sign of her boss. just as she was beginning to walk into the front of the restaurant, a quiet voice came from behind her, "Not planning on slipping through without greeting me, were you Rosie?" Rose gritted her teeth as she turned to face her boss. John Lumic was a long thin sort of man, who reminded you vaguely of an eel, if eels had full sets of sharp yellow teeth.

Rose opened her mouth to make some half though out excuse, but he silenced her with a smile that didn't reach his eyes. He continued, apparently oblivious to Rose's attempt at a reply, "No my Rosie wouldn't do that, now would she?" he circled around her as he spoke, leaning over her shoulder to whisper the last part of his sentence into her ear. Rose shuddered, and reminded herself of all the reasons she needed this job, and that when she finally quit, she'd deck the slimy bastard. He pulled back and looked at her, and gave her a grin that showed all his teeth, "Run along now Rosie, wouldn't want to be late to work now would we?" Rose shook her head and forced a smile, "No Mr. Lumic sir, I wouldn't want that." She turned to leave and forced herself not to jerk away as he trailed a hand down her shoulder. She turned and walked towards the front of the cafe with as brisk a pace she could manage without running.

Line Break

Gallifrey Royal Library…

As John sank down onto his favorite window seat, he tried to organize his jumbled thoughts into some semblance of order. He though back on what his parents had revealed at breakfast. His father felt he was ready for the throne, and planned to step down within the year. John's head was reeling, and he wasn't sure how to feel.

He was proud at the trust his father placed in him, but he was only twenty six, How was he supposed to run a country? He wanted more time to be relatively carefree, or at least as much as you can be when you're next in line for the throne of the largest empire in the world. He looked out the window as he thought. His mother and father had told him he had the remainder of the next several months to do as he wished, before he was saddled with the weight of the crown.

John made a spur of the moment decision, he decided to take the day off and explore London, without a chaperone. He snuck out one of the many additional exits of the library and walked briskly to his quarters. Once there, he penned a quick note addressed to his parents that the staff would no doubt soon find. John knew he was running out of time before his absence was discovered, so he began hastily making his way into the gardens, where he crossed into the side available to the general public through a little known passage that he and his childhood friend Rodger had discovered one summer.

John slowed his pace once he was in the public side of the gardens, and walked sedately to the exit, enjoying the greenery as he went. He shed his suit jacket as he walked, causally pausing and draping it over a bench. He rolled up his shirtsleeves as he did this, as well as undoing the first three buttons of his collar, and reaching up and mussing his hair. John reached the end of the gardens, and made a spur of the moment decision to hail a cab to the natural history museum.

Line Break

Cyberman Cafe…

Rose took a deep breath, having just made a hasty exit from the back room, where Mr. Lumic had tried to corner her yet again. Rose wanted desperately to call her brother, but knew if Jack had even an inkling of how Mr. Lumic treated her, he would most likely spend the night in a jail cell for beating the pulp out of him. Not only was Jack very protective of her, it would also poke the wound of how Jack's father had treated his mother, who had been his father's secretary.

Rose shook herself out of her dour mood and pasted a smile on her face, before heading back out to serve table three. Rose lost herself in her work for a while, even getting to the point of honestly enjoying herself. As she was heading over to bus table seven, she felt a tap on her shoulder. Rose turned to see one of her coworkers, a friendly girl named Astrid, gesture nervously for Rose to follow her into the staffroom.

Rose was unsurprised to see Mr. Lumic waiting for them in the staffroom, and he gestured for Astrid to leave as he sat down on one of the couches. Astrid left, the door closing with an ominous click as she did so. Lumic motioned for Rose to seat herself on the couch opposite him, and stared at her contemplatively for a moment while she did so. Rose was beginning to feel a strong apprehension in her gut as she sat across from her boss.

Mr. Lumic gave her a smile that was evidently meant to put her at ease, but did nothing of the sort. "Now Rosie," He began, "you know that you're my favorite employee, but the economy isn't the best currently, and I'm having to let some of the staff go." He paused, and waited for her reaction, when she didn't give him the satisfaction he resumed talking. "Now, I could be….persuaded, to make sure you weren't one of the unfortunate souls I'm going to have to let go."

Rose felt the apprehension and anger in her gut coil even tighter as she slowly asked, "And how am I meant to persuade you of that, Mr. Lumic?'

Lumic gave her body a slow appraisal as he answered, "I'm sure we could…figure something out." His eyes lingered on her breasts. Rose could feel the rage simmering as she struggled to remain composed, and she spoke with barely repressed rage "No thank you Mr. Lumic, I think I'll pass." She turned and made it all the way to the entrance of the front room before he caught up to her. Putting a hand on her waist, he tried to stop her from leaving, saying "Now Rosie, refusal isn't really an option if you want to keep your job." Rose turned, incandescent with rage, and something in her face made Lumic take as step back as she hissed, "Now listen here and listen good, if you ever lay hand on me again, you will wish you had never been born."

John Lumic, for all his cunning and skills as an entrepreneur, was an idiot, and so he decided to give Rose a parting slap on the ass as she turned to leave. The expression on her face as she turned around made him swiftly regret this decision, as she opened her mouth and reamed him up one side and down the other.

Line Break

John's POV

John had spent an enjoyable few hours wandering the museum, before his stomach had announced its need for food in a rather embarrassingly loud fashion. Glancing at his watch he realized it was nearly one, and he hadn't eaten since around seven thirty that morning. He decided to simply walk to the nearest cafe, rather than take another taxi. He was running short on funds, having taken with him only what was in his wallet. John stopped in front of the first cafe he saw, the Cyberman Cafe.

The bell jingled merrily as a young blond haired woman burst out the door, only to wheel back around and yell after her "And that goes twice for your mother, ya slimy bastard!" before slamming the door so hard the frame shook, and turn back around only to nearly bowl him over. He looked looked at her a moment before asking, "Having a bit of a day then, are we?"

Line Break

Rose's POV

Rose stopped to take a look at the man she had nearly run over, noting that despite being quite skinny he had a definite advantage over her in height. Even through the haze of quickly cooling rage, she decided she liked the look of him. "Yes well, you could say that." she replied, "still, apologies for nearly knocking you over." He grinned, and said "no harm no foul. Well, unless the two people involved were enemies, then I suppose if neither was harmed they'd be quite disappointed, but I don't think we're enemies quite yet, d'you think?" he replied, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He darted a quick glance behind Rose at the cafe, "Don't suppose you recommend that cafe then, do you?"

Rose glanced behind her at the Cyberman Cafe, "No, I don't suppose I do." she replied. She glanced at the stranger in front of her, she didn't even know his name, she gave a mental shrug. "Tell you what, I'll recommend you to my favorite chip cart, and I'll even treat you to lunch there." She offered, waiting for him to rebuke her forwardness.

She was pleasantly surprised, then, When he gave her a manic grin and accepted her offer. She grinned back for a moment before remembering something, "What was your name again?" He looked at her for a short moment, brow furrowed, before he apparently came to a decision and replied "Jonathan Hartnell, the fifth, at your service. But my friends call me John." He grinned. Rose gave a little start, and a automatic "I'm Rose." Before giving him a long look, sure he was pulling her leg, but as she searched his features she couldn't believe how she had missed what was right in front of her. Here she was, offering to take the future King of Gallifrey to lunch, dear god, she had nearly nocked him into the gutter! She didn't even want to think how much he was ensured for.

Just as she opened her mouth to say something, though she knew not what, John threw a hunted look at something over her shoulder, before looking back at her with sudden urgency. He gave her another manic grin, "Nice to meet you Rose, now run for your life!"


	2. Chapter 2

Rose panted as she ran, heavily questioning her life decisions.  
Just this morning she had woken up, gotten breakfast, woken Jack, and gone to work. Same normal routine. And now here she was, running madcap through London, apparently being chased by the royal guards, alongside the crown

prince of all people!

Rose shouted in surprise as she nearly ran into a lamppost, John pulling her out of the way just in time. After that, she decided to leave further examination the morning's events till later.

John's POV

"Why, exactly, are we running for our lives?" Rose somehow managed to pant out, in between dodging civilians and keeping her grip on his hand. She shouted suddenly in surprise as she served wildly to doge a lorry.

John was impressed at her fortitude.

"We're running for our lives because I spotted a group of bodyguards ready to take me back to the palace trying to sneak up on us.  
Weeeell, really the guards were trying to sneak up on me, and you invited me for lunch. And I do love chips, so you're along for the ride!" John shouted back, jumping wildly away from a speeding taxi that honked loudly at them as it careened around the corner.

"I suppose that's a fair point." Rose conceded thoughtfully, as John pulled them into an alley and they ducked behind some bins while they waited for the guards to pass them.

"Why, exactly, are we running from your bodyguards though?" Rose questioned, "Seems like they're people you'd tend to stick with, ain't they?"

John risked a quick glance at the mouth of the alley as he replied, "Not when you're taking an unescorted and unauthorized tour of London they aren't."

John paused as one of his customarily brilliant ideas popped into his head, "Hey Rose, since I'm already ducking the guards, I think I might just keep at it, I still have enough in my wallet to catch a train to France, and then who knows where I'll go from there, and since you just seem to have quit your job, you could come with me? If you like?"

Rose opened her mouth to answer him, a disappointed look on her face, "I'd love to John, but my brother-" she was cut off by a noise from her pocket.  
~I'm to sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts~  
John raised a single eyebrow.

He was quite proud of that skill, it had taken him many hours of practice in front of his bathroom mirror to achieve his mastery of it.

Rose's POV

Rose hurriedly dug out her phone from her pocket and answered, "Jack, I'm a little in the middle of something-" Jack interrupted her excitedly, "Rosie, I got the job at Torchwood, I ship out tomorrow if I accept! Do you think you could stay at Martha's until you find a cheaper place? I'm sorry to do this to you on such short notice but it's a great opportunity, and you've been pushing me towards getting out more so I figured you would be for it and-"

"Jack, Jack," Rose laughed, "it's fine, it's perfect actually, you don't have to worry about me, take what you need from the apartment, and arrange for the rest to be put in storage," she turned to give John a wide grin, "I think I'll be doing a bit of traveling."

Johns POV

Rose was grinning as she pulled John into the small cafe she swore up and down had the best chips in the known universe. It was tucked away between a bookstore and a haberdashery, and despite its small size it was a cheerful sunlit little place, with murals painted on the walls and people eating and talking quietly at the tables scattered around the shop.

The woman at the counter looked up from her book when she heard the bell on the door jingle as they stepped into the shop. Her face lit up at the sight of Rose, and she quickly walked over to give her a hug, reproaching her as she did so, "Rose! I haven't seen you in ages, just where have you been? Agatha has been missing you something terrible."

Rose just smiled as she was checked over for any injuries, and once given a clean bill of health, hugged again. "Shareen, I'm fine, really. I've just been a little busy, Lumic was working me to the bone."

Shareen gave Rose an exasperated look, "you know the offer for you to work here is still open? I know you wanted to earn you job by your own merit, and not your connections, but that man gives me the creeps, and I never seem to see you any more!"

Shareen paused,  
"Wait, did you say 'was'? You've quit? Finally! Did you break his nose? Can I break his nose?" Shareen caught sight of John and paused in the midst of the buildup to her rant, "and who's this here?" She asked, eyeing John up and down, "Have you found yourself a boyfriend then Rose?" Not giving Rose the chance to offer any denials, she turned the full weight of her gaze on John.

John felt suddenly fearful, being the sole recipient of Shareen's attention. John began to sputter denials, but Shareen just patted his cheek ans shushed him, before leaving him and Rose some chips, calling behind her "On the house love, you need some meat on those bones!" As she disappeared into the back.

Rose looked at him sympathetically as he stood staring after where Shareen had disappeared, unsure what to do, having never been treated quite so brusquely before.

Rose's POV

Rose bit her cheek to keep from laughing at John's dumbfounded expression as he stared at the still swinging door where Shareen had disappeared into the back. "Don't worry, she has that affect on people." She reassured him, leading him by the hand to a nearby table as she did so.

Just as Rose was moving to seat herself across from John, she was intercepted by a small dark haired girl who zoomed around the counter and collided forcefully with Rose's legs.

Rose only just remained upright, but instead of scolding her she swept the now gleefully giggling child into her arms and spun them both around, "there's my Aggie girl!" Rose exclaimed, "look how big you are, you must be taller than me now! And so grown up! Are those grey hairs I see?" Aggie just playfully turned up her nose and stuck out her tongue out in response to the now routine exclamations of greying hair and wrinkles, and by doing so missed the devious look on her godmothers face. Rose was quick to take advantage of Agatha's playful scorn and began tickling her mercilessly. Agatha shrieked with laughter and began frantically trying to wiggle away from Rose.

It was to this scene that Shareen made her return, quickly taking in John's state of mild shock, and the brutal tickle attack being launched on her daughter by her honorary sister, all she could do was laugh. The startled exclamations and deer in the headlight expressions on the faces of the three, who hadn't realized she was there, only made her laugh harder.

John's POV

John found himself smiling as he looked at the woman sleeping on his shoulder. Despite her protests to the contrary, she had passed right out as soon as they had boarded the train, which was understandable considering their breathless run through London a few hours earlier.

He paused in his recollections to survey his surroundings.

The countryside sped past at a nearly sickening speed as the train hurtled through the English countryside on its way to France. From there, John though, they might make their way to Spain, and after that, he wasn't sure yet. He didn't know, and really, he didn't care.

And wasn't that exhilarating? The sheer freedom of not knowing and not caring where he was going next? Not having every moment of his day carefully planned out by, constantly having to adhere to the Royal Schedule.

He glanced down at Rose again, this time with fond bemusement.  
who was this woman, his new traveling companion? He hadn't know her more than a few hours, and yet they had the easy camaraderie of old friends. It was nice, how irreverent she was, she didn't hesitate to put him in his place. She didn't hesitate to put anyone in their place.

John had no doubts that wether Rose was confronted with a King or a commoner, she would not hesitate to tell them exactly what she thought, should they provoke her.

His shoulders actually shook slightly with the effort to keep his laughter silent at the thought of what Rose would have had to say to some of the foreign dignitaries he'd had to deal with.

Rose's POV

Rose looked up blearily when her pillow began to move and shake, glaring at her perceived enemy, who looked torn between laughter and fear as he looked down to behold her spectacular bedhead, and her equally withering glare.

Rose was not a morning person. Rose was not a fan of waking up period, no matter the time. The only thing Rose was a fan of upon waking up was a strong cup of tea and the absence of people wanting to interact with her.

She continued to glare at her pillow for a moment, before she remembered the day's events so far, and with that remembrance came the sudden knowledge that her "pillow" was the crown prince of England.

Rose contemplated this, staring up at John for a moment as she did so, before giving a mental shrug and asking "How close are we to France? I'm in severe need of a cup of tea and I bet we could find a cafe at the station."

John opened his mouth to reply, but whatever he intended to say became redundant as the train shuddered to a stop and the people around them began to disembark. John let out a yawn as Rose sat up next to him, stretching his arms towards the ceiling and letting loose a gusty sigh as his back popped.

He shouldered the duffel bag that Rose had packed at Shareen's, and gestured for Rose to disembark first. John took and deep breath and didn't even try to keep the slow grin from spreading across his face as he looked out onto the station, and took in the freedom it represented and the adventure waiting just beyond it.

In front of him, Rose turned briefly to give him a look that showed just what she thought of him halting her journey towards the nearest source of tea, and he quickly gathered his wits and caught up to her, easily joining hands with her as he did so.


End file.
